Level Up! With Shay

I had a crazy dream last night. I’ll set it up the best way a crazy dream can be set up, so bear with me. The scenario – I had one year left to play basketball for what seemed like a summer league of sorts. There were a lot of players, coaches, and attendees scattered around with no bleachers and a random hot tub in the corner. 

I was just a little bit older than everyone, not sure how old, but old enough to know I was too old. My team was playing and it was time for everyone to switch out the active players for the ones on the bench. I start to get on the floor, but no one is subbing out for me. It’s like they all called dibs to stay in that I didn’t know about it. There was even one player who came from another game somewhere else right before, let’s call her Megan. She was still holding her trophy while she explained to me why she couldn’t sub out with no regard to the fact that I hadn’t played one second! 

I went over to my coach who was sitting at a table with a few others on the baseline. I approached him regarding my play time and he was very nonchalant about my need to be in the game! In a very nice and laid back way, he recommended that I go to my teammates and demand that one of them sub out. I say “I’ve already tried that!”. He responds with a shrug and then gets back to shooting the sh*t with the other coaches. 

Then, somehow water from the random hot tub in the corner gets in my shoes and I walk to the locker room completely defeated. This is where things get WEIRD.

Next thing you know, I’m in Italy riding a four wheeler that turns into a snowmobile. (Reminder to please bear with me). Snowmobiles don’t do well on paved concrete roads, I found out – even in dreams! – and I crash onto the side into a picnic area. I meet a girl, let’s call her crazy girl (you’ll know why in a second), who is sawing off a woman’s arm but as if she was just giving her a tattoo. (…Crazy. Girl.). Both look like they’re having fun, so oddly I don’t sense any threat. She comes over to me and is very friendly and I find she just really wants to have a good time! She tells me enthusiastically that it would be so fun for both of us if she sawed off my arm as well. I’m convinced! She starts and it’s not terrible, but I had a gut feeling I shouldn’t be there right now. 

I find a way out and find a MUCH better thing…a puppy!! At this point, I GOTTA find my way home. I’m at the airport with no money, no knowledge of Italian or whatever language was being spoken, and a random puppy. While in an empty stairwell, I see what looks like a wealthy businessman on his cell phone who I think might be able to help me, but when I make eye contact with him he sneaks out in an emergency exit. Damn him! I need help! I realize I can get my way onto a plane by myself, but the only thing holding me back is this precious little puppy. And if I tried to hide it, that would cause even more problems. I had a choice to make.

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Back to real life – during this quarantine I’ve had some WEIRD dreams, but this one felt different. This one I remembered. This one, when I woke up, left a feeling in me. A feeling of heartbreak. I knew I had to get on a piece of paper. And this is what came to me. 

Each of the characters I came across in my dream had something to tell me, maybe as another person or possibly as myself. I have yet to distinguish that clearer. 

Coach – My coach cared a lot about me, no doubt. In fact, he wanted to see me succeed, shoot for the stars, and show all of my teammates that I belonged on that court! But at the end of the day, he couldn’t hand me that success. It wasn’t his responsibility to put in work for me or to speak up for me – that was ON ME.

Megan – I called this girl Megan because it was literally a girl I went to high school and played basketball with. She was a fighter on the court and I loved her for it! But Dream Megan didn’t care about if I had played no minutes or 40 minutes, she just wanted to PLAY! She was a champion, someone who was obsessed with getting better, and the type of person who wants to hang out with others who also work their asses off just because that’s who they are!

Crazy girl – This girl LOVED a good time. She would’ve done anything, even if it didn’t benefit others, to live an adventurous, but crazy life. When she sawed off my arm or the other woman’s, it wasn’t personal, she just wanted to have fun! 

Puppy – Awww the puppy. The precious puppy was so cute! …But it was the only thing stopping me from making it home. 

Businessman – I was running around lost with a puppy in my hand, but this guy didn’t give a crap! It also seemed like he was dealing with something on the other end of his phone call and was looking for a quiet space. Did he care about my problems? No. But did he owe me anything? Also, no. 

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Before waking up from my dream, I actually did make it home. To the people I cared about most. They were, at least my mom, a little timid to say hi; like I was some sort of stranger. I don’t know, I thought, maybe I hadn’t been there or cherished them enough. Maybe because I had been too busy paying attention to the coach not making it happen for me, Megan not letting me play, crazy girl and her craziness, the precious puppy I couldn’t let go of, or the guy in the airport who never cared in the first place. 

And there I was, at the end of my life, sitting on the bench, with all the permission and opportunity in the world to get in the game and play, but I stopped myself. That is my definition of heartbreak. 

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If you have read this far, bless you. I hope you find the things in life you care about the most and give them the attention they deserve. We have one life to live and every moment to choose. Use that power.

I am starting a podcast called Level Up! With Shay to ask successful business owners, entrepreneurs, executives, artists, and more what it takes to level up – I’d love for you to join! If you’d like to interact, my guest Yancy Berry, an Award Winning Personal Trainer and Certified Life Coach based in Los Angeles, CA, and I will be LIVE on ZOOM Tuesday May 5th at 7:15PM PST. Register HERE!

If you are unable to attend, make sure to follow @levelupwithshay on Instagram and Twitter to find out when the video and audio are posted on YouTube and anywhere you listen to podcasts (Spotify, Apple Podcasts, etc.)!

Take care, stay safe, and until next time,

Shay