Hope you’re having a great start to your week!
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This past weekend I dressed up as Dora the Explorer and did a battle rap against Carmen San Diego.
Yes, that’s a real sentence and yes, that really happened.
I remember seeing someone post about the show a couple weeks ago in a Facebook group asking for people who wanted to participate.
I had so many things going on at the time that, logically, it made no sense for me to sign up, but for whatever reason, I jumped at the occasion.
There was something inside me that got excited when I thought about the opportunity. So I reached out to the person and signed up immediately.
I knew if I did it quickly I wouldn’t have to time to think about all of what it was going to entail – writing a rap, practicing said rap, dressing up, finding a wig, getting up in front of a bunch of people I don’t know and looking silly.
And what if I FORGOT the rap?!
WILL EVERYONE LAUGH AT ME?? OR MAYBE EVEN WORSE…BE COMPLETELY SILENT???
Tragedy.
After I signed up and decided on characters with my partner, I had a week to write and practice. The first 3-5 days my mind was going wild.
“Can I get out of this?”
“I wonder if there’s a way I could cancel…”
“Maybe my partner will cancel and I’ll be off the hook!”
Blah blah blah…blah blah.
But then on Wednesday, I decided to actually go for it. To actually give it my all. To sit down, write, and practice. I even asked my roommate, to hold me accountable to have it memorized by noon on Saturday (the show was at 10pm).
I decided to let go of all thoughts of bailing and focus on the thought “Since I am doing this, I am going to try my BEST.”
I spent a lot of time those next few days practicing in front of my mirror, all around the house, in my car, and then it was showtime.
And guess what??? I…
didn’t win.
In the end, the audience picked Carmen San Diego as the winner.
I really wasn’t surprised because not only was her performance great, but even after all the practice, my biggest fear had come up…
I kept forgetting the lines!!!
…Tragedy.
And I gotta say, as much fun as the show was and all of the people who were involved, I wasn’t happy with the fact that I forgot some of the lines.
But I knew that beating up on myself for forgetting the lines wasn’t going to be helpful. Instead, I thought of alllll the things I learned from this experience.
I learned…
– my brain will try to talk me out of things that scare me, but when I decide to not listen to that voice, I give myself space and freedom to start taking action
– I can handle the stage even when I forget my lines
– I can push and encourage myself to do anything
– sometimes I can give my best effort and it still doesn’t work out
– when I feel like jumping at an opportunity, it’s for a reason
– I love to be goofy
Not forgetting my lines is a great goal to have when I’m performing, but what happens when I don’t achieve that goal? Do I fail? Do I experience a loss?
When we can look back on any situation and turn it into an opportunity to learn, then it is no longer a win or a loss, a failure or a success.
Because at the end of our lives, we won’t think of moments as successes or failures, but rather the stepping stones to learn lessons and grow wiser.
“It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters in the end.” – Ernest Hemingway
Instead of being upset that I lost or forgot some words, I remember the moment I was excited to sign up, the times where I wrote my rap, went and got the wig, hours of practice, getting to the theater and meeting some hilarious women and watching them perform.
If we base our feelings on how well we do on one milestone we’ve set for ourselves, then we tend to block out all of the other things which made the milestone possible in the first place.
The good, the bad, the exciting, the nerves, the disappointment – take it ALL in.
THIS is the journey.
What’s one milestone moment you’ve had lately and what were all the other moments that made the milestone possible?
Thanks for reading!
Talk to you next week…
Shay ♥️
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