Level Up! With Shay

Good evening – or morning or whatever time it is for you. For me, it’s the evening. I’m pretty tired, considering I got four hours of sleep last night, I’m allowed to feel tired. I texted to my friend today, “I slept 4 hours last night. Do I win something?” He replied lovingly “Ayyyy yeah! You win the fact that you are Shay Dominguez.” It struck me.

There have been a lot of posts, tweets, memes, going around talking about capitalism and how it’s made everyone go nuts, not sleep not take care of themselves, and it’s a whole contest to see who can go the most days in a row without any sleep. Ok maybe not that last part, but it’s definitely up there. People make it out to be this evil thing we have to control. We can’t let capitalism get to us! And I get it. It should be a flow. It should be all about loving yourself and not doing it for the money. But, for me at least, that’s the dream right?

I slept 4 hours last night because I got up at 5am to be at work at 7am. My new morning routine as of the last few days since being in my house has been to stretch, make breakfast, make lunch, shower, write in my journal and leave. And then I went to bed at 1am because I had work until 4pm, got home at 5pm, and spent the rest of my night either eating dinner or creating and editing content. All because of this, I got four hours of sleep. Is this bad? Should I blame this all on capitalism?

No. I did this because I have an obligation to myself to get certain things done before I go to bed for the night. And yes, I do have big dreams that include the money, the car, the house, the vacations, but what’s wrong with that? The fact that I want to have really cool experiences and nice, luxurious things does not mean that I am materialistic all because of capitalism. When it was the early 1900’s, people worked day AND night to have nice experiences as well. And I’m sure when there were cavemen and women, they were also striving for nice things. That’s just the way society and humans work!

This morning when I woke up at 5am, exhausted, I wondered to myself “Am I pushing too hard? Is this all worth it? Am I taking care of myself?” and what kept coming back to me was “You’re fine.” Not because it’s good to get 4 hours asleep so I can win some award or recognition. And not because it’s ok to not take care of myself. I am fine because this is what I do. I am Shay Dominguez. Sometimes I sleep 4 hours a night because I have to pay the bills and also move forward in my dreams. I don’t do it EVERY night. I’m really looking forward to some great sleep and rest this weekend. I AM taking care of myself. If I were to put off the obligations to myself, I would not be MENTALLY healthy.

No, my work does not define me. I 100% define my work. And I think the work I did last night and any night I stay up until the next day is worth the 2, 3, 4 less hours of sleep that I’m gonna get. And when I tell you I got four hours of sleep, don’t say “You’re crazy! You shouldn’t be doing that! Get some sleep!” I mean, you’re allowed to say that and a lot of people do. But I can tell you, that my friend who I texted today UNDERSTANDS. He knows what it takes. I don’t have to explain my craziness to him or justify why I should only get four hours of sleep. Do I KNOW that four hours is not “enough”? Yes! I’m not an infant. But I shouldn’t feel bad about staying up. I should feel supported. And I do feel supported.

Capitalism does not define me. My work does not define me. The amount of sleep I get DO NOT DEFINE ME. What defines me is what I am willing to do to accomplish my goals and dreams. You keep talking. I’ll keep working. Let’s talk again in 5 years. Capitalism ain’t the problem. How you place external and societal approvals or disapprovals in regards to what’s right for YOU is the problem.

Thoughts? Agree? disagree? I’d love to hear it. Comment below!

#LevelUp

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